3 Divorce Lessons We Can Learn From Lewis Hamilton’s Career
In today’s episode of inspiration comes from unexpected places, we look at race car driver extraordinaire and eight-time Formula 1 World Champion*, Lewis Hamilton, who has never been married. In fact, as far as I am aware, he is not in a romantic relationship at the moment. Despite his single status, watching Hamilton’s performance during the Abu Dhabi Grand Prix this weekend, led me to think of the lessons a married person can take from him, if they are going through the challenging journey of navigating the end of their marriage.
- It’s not how you start…
Spoiler alert: after a disappointing qualifying session on Saturday, which resulted in Hamilton starting Sunday’s Abu Dhabi Grand Prix in 16th place, in an amazing turn of events which only Lewis could achieve, he astonishingly finished the race in 4th place, even managing to surpass his own teammate, George Russell, who started the race 9 places ahead of him!
Following the underwhelming qualifying session, and prior to the actual race, I had a text exchange with my cousin (and fellow Lewis Hamilton fan), during which I attempted to remain positive, saying to him that ‘nothing is impossible’ for Lewis. His response was that ‘it’s hard to overtake in Abu Dhabi…it’s going to be tough’. His sentiments were not unique, as many Hamilton fans feared an anticlimactic end to the 2024 Formula 1 season. This clearly was not the case. The race was full of unpredictability, of unexpected victory, and almost a sense of vindication. Whilst it was not an easy race, Hamilton’s starting position was far from ideal, and his result was not perfect, the strength of his performance to achieve the result that he did, was a clear reminder that ‘hard’ is not synonymous with ‘impossible’.
Going through a divorce is known to be one of the most challenging times a person can go through in life, and has often been compared to the death of a loved one. Having witnessed many a divorce in the 10+ years I’ve practiced Family Law, my observation is that in the vast majority of cases (and in all cases I’ve known), individuals end up in a better position than that which they were in during their marriages- and better than they ever imagined they could be. Voices around you, including your own, may focus on the current challenges, rather than the possibility of a greater future ahead. This is your reminder that those greater days are attainable, the ‘results’ do not need to look perfect, and have faith that things will be better than they currently are.
- The importance of surrounding yourself with the right people.
In Hamilton’s emotional radio message to his Mercedes team at the conclusion of the race, he said to his engineer, with whom he has worked for eleven years, ‘we dreamed alone but together, we believed. As a team, we achieved things… Thank you for all the courage, the determination and the passion, and for seeing me and supporting me. What started out as a leap of faith turned into a journey into the history books’.
In all stages, and in all aspects of life, the people we choose to have around us will often have a profound impact on us; how we see ourselves, and how easily we are able to navigate through life’s adversities. It is clear from Hamilton’s radio message that, for the last eleven years, his team has provided him with the support and encouragement he has needed, to have achieved all he has for himself- and, of course, for the team. Things have not always been straightforward, and the journey has included numerous ‘failures’, as well as successes. But, the spirit of the team, and the faith they have maintained together, is what has kept them going and refusing to aim for anything less than their best.
Everyone’s team looks different, as everyone has individual needs, which evolve at various stages of their lives. Going through the divorce process, it is hugely important to have a support system to call on. This includes family and friends, who uplift you, who allow you to shed tears when needed, and who will help you look at the bright side, when it feels impossible. I appreciate this is not for everyone, but it may benefit you to consider some form of therapy or counselling, enabling you to confide in someone without fear of judgement, and release some of the feelings which you have been harbouring, and which have been weighing you down. Finally, if you are looking for legal representation, look for a solicitor who you feel you can express yourself with, who does not make you feel like any question is too ‘silly’ to ask, and who gives you realistic advice, even if it makes for an ‘uncomfortable’ conversation. At a time where you are going through the divorce process, and navigating a completely new normal, it is important to be surrounded and supported by people you can trust, and that also extends to your legal professionals.
- Joining a new ‘team’ may be the change you need.
After eleven record-breaking years with Mercedes, which has included both ups and downs, Hamilton will be joining the Ferrari team from next season (lucky them!). As I touched upon earlier, our needs evolve during the course of our lives, and it is important to be able to recognise that, and know it is okay to change the people around us, if that better suits our current needs.
Whilst many were in shock when it was announced earlier this season that Hamilton’s journey with Mercedes would come to an end this year, many fans were able to recognise that Mercedes may no longer be serving Hamilton’s ability to achieve his greatest potential, with the Mercedes vehicles frequently struggling to match the speed and ability of their competitors. Fans have also speculated on unsatisfactory treatment Hamilton may have received from management.
Whilst Hamilton was able to achieve a great deal with Mercedes, what is in store for him to achieve with Ferrari may be even greater!
Just because you have invested many years and emotions in a person does not mean that you must remain bound to them for life, if your relationship with them no longer serves you. It is true for all aspects of life that with discomfort comes growth from a baby going through teething pains, to someone going through medical treatment to allow them to have a better quality of life, to an eight-time Formula 1 World Champion leaving the team he has worked with for eleven years for pastures new. Allow yourself to be uncomfortable. Know it is okay to be uncomfortable. It is not forever, and without allowing yourself the opportunity to get to the other side, you will never know how wonderful it could be.
It is also true that moving on to a new team, whether in Formula 1 or romantically, does not mean that your previous relationship needs to end on a sour note – Hamilton’s emotional radio message to his team shows that. Consider a Solicitor who is a member of Resolution (an organisation committed to dealing with Family matters in a constructive and non-confrontational manner), who can assist you with progressing matters in a way which minimises acrimony between you and your spouse. Reaching the decision to apply for a divorce is difficult enough; the process does not need to be difficult too.
